The Weekend Grab-Bag: The "On the Job" Version

Well it's Monday night/Tuesday morning and I am well awake. It's 0030. Sleep is not in my near future. I figured since that was true, I would at least blog about my weekend and fill you in on some thoughts I've been having recently.

And away we go. . .

- First, let me assess the NBA playoffs. If you don't like the NBA (or basketball - which, if that's the case, shame on you. . .) then skip to the next dash/section. . . When I last blogged, my SUNS were at halftime of an eventual loss. They picked up the pieces and demolished the Lakers in Game 4 (behind a 27 point/21 rebound game from Amare and a 17 point/23 assist game from Nash). I firmly believe that we take care of business on Wednesday at home and end the Lakers' season after five games. We are gonna play the Spurs, who have squeaked by the Nuggets three times to take a 3-1 lead heading back to San Antonio. It's gonna be a tough series but if we win, I believe that the Finals will be ours to lose. The biggest reason is that Dallas, the 67-15 team that dominated the regular season, is on the verge of elimination thanks to a tremendous effort from the upstart Golden State Warriors. I think the Warriors take care of business back home in Game 6 after a Dallas blowout in Game 5. The Warriors will beat the Houston Rockets in the second round after they beat the Jazz in a low-scoring Game 7 to win their first round battle. We will take down the Cinderella Warriors (oxymoronic, no?) in six high-scoring battles (one of which will go into double overtime and result in at least 300 total points) and represent the Western Conference in the NBA Finals! We will play the Detroit Pistons who will beat the Baby Bulls in five games. Yes, the Bulls swept the defending champ Heat. The Heat are also a terrible team with a broken down superstar. The Nets might just sweep the overrated Cavs (who swept an undermanned Wizards by winning no game by double digits) after they get rid of the Raptors in six games. The Pistons will then coast by the Nets in no more than six games. They are the team to beat out East. Once we meet them in the Finals, we will be more than ready to bring back the first-ever championship trophy to Phoenix. I think we beat the Pistons in six games with the speedy Leandro Barbosa winning the Finals MVP. . . Now we'll just have to wait and watch that happen. But you heard it here first!

- I've been working a lot! Training was in full swing over at BJ's this past weekend as we hosted several invitation-only lunches and dinners. The guests were given free meals (not free alcohol, though!) in order to deal with our training. We did a good job (I thought) and we are ready to open on Wednesday of this week. However, when I was working on Sunday night (a night which I really did not feel like working) I started to feel something. This thing I was feeling was not good. I was slowly hating my job. A lot of it had to do with the power-tripping trainers who make it a habit to make you feel about an inch tall with their strict "by the book" ways. The things that they have us do are so particular that it is driving me crazy. It's the "small things" that are very silly, but are a way of doing things at BJ's and thus must be done. It's policy. Plus, I have yet to feel in my "zone" that I would get in while cleaning tables at Johnny Carino's. A couple things: 1) This just might not be the restaurant for me - just because I'm good at bussing (and I am, actually) does not mean that I will flourish in every restaurant. 2) I am not happy.

And that is the problem. I'm not happy. I have three jobs (Finish Line, BJ's, student) and I despise all of them. Sure, there are parts of each that I enjoy, but on the whole, I cannot stand doing anything in relation to these things. This got me thinking. What makes me happy? . .

- So here is a list of all of my jobs (you will see that I actually have more than three) and my evaluation of how I am doing with all of them:

FINISH LINE: I have been working there since December and for the last three months or so I have been the best salesperson out of the Sales Associates. Our numbers are tracked each week and the two biggest numbers are the accessories percentage (these are hats, laces, socks, cleaners) and the multiples percentage (purchases that contain more than one item). The weekly goal is usually 8.5% for accessories and 50% for multiples. I usually carry at least 10% in accessories adn my multiples are almost always over 60%. Today, for instance, I left with a 13% and 80%. It was a great day! However, I can't stand the monotony of selling shoes. I have decided that at least 75% of the people who enter our store either a) know exactly what they want already or b) want nothing. It's hard to be a great salesperson when people are either not wanting more items (regardless of the fact that our bags of socks are buy one get one free!) or can't speak English and don't really want any zapatos (or only want them if they cost next to nothing). The sooner I get out of this job the better - the only thing I will miss is the discount.

BJ's: It's hard to say how this job is going to be. Once I start making the money (I hope I hope I hope!!!) I might like it more and realize why I got back in the restaurant business. But last night as I trudged around wanting to take my apron off and walk outside for good, I realized what the problem was: I don't want to clean tables! Sure, I left JC because of the scheduling and Charlie and all that jazz, but it really boiled down to the fact that I did not want to clean another table. And now, that's all I'm doing. Again. How did this happen!?! Hopefully this one gets better, but I am just not feeling this restaurant. It's just not for me. . .

STUDENT: The hardest thing about the last two semesters has been Heather's involvement at her school, Cal Poly Pomona. She has been taking classes for her major: Animal Handling, Animal Care, etc. I have been taking General freakin Education! Yes, I have been on the paper for two semesters. But I don't really want to write for a paper (not a very lucrative job, reporting. . .). It's hard to get excited for school twice a week when one of those days includes a three hour tribute to William Shakespeare and his overrated comedies and sonnets. I am really hoping that school is going to get better when I get to CSUN and I join the radio station (if I can) or follow the basketball team around as an announcer or beat writer (if it's doable) or something of that sort. That's what I want to do. But I can't. Not yet.

BOYFRIEND: The thing I am best at. I think. Heather and I have been together for over three years and I feel like I do a good job at being a good partner. I do everything in my power to please Heather and make her feel comfortable with me. We mesh extremely well (shockingly so) and there is no reason to doubt us as being ready for the future. However. . . We have been having a lot of discussions about marriage and when that is possible. It seems that we have two options: 1) The summer of 2009 after we both graduate from our 4-year universities; 2) after 2013 when she (hopefully) graduates from Veterinarian School. Those are two very different years. 2009 is in two years. True, we are both 20 now (or I will be in a few days) and that is rather young to be thinking about this. However, in 2009, we will be 22 and that is not a terrible age to be married. . . We want to do it. We know it will be hard the first four years since she will be in Vet School and I will be working my initial job out of college (whatever that is). But we would be together. That is what we both want and shouldn't that be enough? I know that we won't get full support for that idea, but we feel like there are no other desireable options (e.g. waiting for 2013, a full six years from now - that would mean we would date for at least 9 years before getting married!). So we will see. . . But maybe save a date in June/July of 2009. You never know. . . I'll keep you in the know (wink, wink)

BROTHER: I think I'm a pretty good older brother, but I'm not the best. Aimee (who turns 15 in - gasp - three days) and I are best friends at this point and I cant be happier about that. No one makes me laugh harder than her and we share a lot of the same viewpoints and a sense of humor. I'm not worried about her and I. I worry about Caleb. The two of us bicker more than anything else (it's a little difficult for a 20-year-old and an almost 6-year-old to be bestest buddies - there's a reason you hang out with people your age!). I love the kid and would do anything for him - sure. He admires me and models a lot of his actions after me - shit. But the age difference is such that it really hurts our relationship right now. I see us becoming closer when he is in his mid teens and I am almost 30. But until then, I guess I'll have to enjoy those few moments when we enjoy each other's company and make each other belly laugh.

SON: I hear I am pretty good at this one. Who knows? It's funny knowing that two of my four readers are my parents. . . and the other two are my grandparents! (That's a joke of course, but I don't really know who else reads this blog - - - commenting is pretty easy people. . .) I have good relationships with my parents and I can learn a lot from each of them. But I also get annoyed like anyone else would when you live under the same roof as someone for year after year. It is bound to happen. I respect their authority and I listen to what they have to say. I do as I'm told (most of the time. . . haha!) and I work hard to make sure they don't regret letting me stay home. I can't do much more than that. . .

CHRISTIAN: I used to characterize myself as this. Now? I'm not so sure. . . (and this is where the trouble comes in). . . Do I believe the things that I have been taught since toddler-age? Yeah. I believe that a higher being must have created all of the Earth's greatness (not to mention the millions of galaxies outside of our Earth). I believe that a guy named Jesus was born and did his thing while he was here before dying by way of Roman crucifixion. I also believe that one thing he taught was freedom and choice. I think that people should not judge others for having other beliefs. Critical Christians are probably the worst people on the planet. These are the people that make me reconsider the whole faith if that is what the religion turns you into. I know it's not - - but the evidence is glaring. Again, as with BJ's, it is the particulars that get me. People who swear are not necessarily bad people. They may be less educated (I have always seen profanity use as a lack of accessibility to better diction - even in my own case) but are certainly not worse because of their word choice. Someone should not be cast out because of their mouth. Or their lifestyle. I have met some legitimately fantastic people outside of my little Christian bubble that I grew up in. And by a certain book, these people are going to spend forever in a warm vacation spot (and no, I don't mean the Caribbean). Some of these people are the sweetest, most talented, and perfectly wonderful people that I have ever met (Don Bachardy, the world-renowned painter, comes to mind right away).

I was thinking about something today: Maybe the reason I am not happy is that I have abandoned the faith that I knew so well back in high school. I avoid church Sunday (I don't feel like I belong) and I don't pray unless I need some help (or if the SUNS are in a tight game. . .). The good and bad things happen the same as they would anyway because I am still a good person. I do good things because I am a pretty good guy - and I reap benefits because of it. It's like karma (thanks Earl. . .) but I think that's a silly word. It's just give and take. You water the garden, something is gonna grow. I know my whole family would probably be upset at me (I guess we'll see - - this has all now been published) but I can't deny the place that I'm in right now. I've said it before (but I don't think I have here): In this time, for my generation, it is extremely difficult to be so self-centered (which we have to be to get anywhere in this world) and so God-centered at the same time. It's not possible. And right now, I've chosen myself. For this time period, I am focused on me and the people around me - my loved ones. I want life - this time we have right now - to be everything that God wants it to be for all of us. When I finally ask for his help - he'll be there. I know that (I've been taught it all my life). But for now, I'm me-focused and that's all that I'm strong enough to do. . . Sorry.

- If you got through all of that, then you are incredible. Let me know what you think. Yes, that means you grandparents, parents, friends, everyone - if I'm wrong, then tell me! I just opened my heart wide open and let you into my deepest thoughts/beliefs. The least you can do is give me your two cents - - and remember, it is now 0200. I may not be completely fluent, but you get the gist of what I am saying - I'll add an addendum in the next day or two after I get some feedback - so please feed me back :D

- A quick movie recommendation: DISTURBIA. It was a very skillfully made thriller that was mostly buildup (but I liked the buildup dangit!) but still a quality film. Check it out! (Grade: B)

Well I'm gonna go to bed - maybe. I don't know if I should just stay up tonight.

Remember to comment - it's really VERY simple - and I'll holler at you in a couple days!

Goodnight,