Thursday, May 31, 2007

The Nearly Empty Parking Lot

School is over!!!

Enough said. . .

My blogging has been pitiful as of late, but deservedly so. As today was my last day of school, I turned in my 25 page research paper on the Philippines, gave a five page presentation in Shakespeare, and also turned in an eight page journal for Shakespeare. This after having done my big group project on Tuesday in Human Sexuality and turning in my final portfolio for Journalism.

Needless to say, I've been busy.

I am planning on blogging at least twice a week from now until August or so once school starts up again. That's the goal, at least.

Since I am about to head out to hang out with Cy (a celebration of being done with school, if you will), I will just present you my final project that I turned in and read aloud in Shakespeare today. There are some insider notes (e.g. Shakespeare related jokes) but it is pretty good, I think. That was the response I got at least, which surprised me, seeing that I pretty much slam Shakespeare - - but it's honesty. And I think that's what people are attracted to. . .

So enjoy this, and I hope that you have a good weekend - - - type at you then :D

A Rambler’s Rambling: The Shakespeare Version

- Honors English 236

- Shakespeare’s romances, comedies, and sonnets

- Three hours a week

- And don’t forget your jacket

- The room can be rather cold

- Yet don’t always blame the air conditioner

- But I digress

- Taming of the Shrew

- Our first play studied

- A tale of marriage and submission

- Sounds redundant, no?

- Look, there’s love

- Look, there’s hate

- Look, there’s life

- Katherine and Petruchio

- Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton

- Julia Stiles and Heath Ledger

- Yet I recall the dancers from San Francisco

- Go figure

- Deception

- Duplicity

- Dishonesty

- Isn’t alliteration fun?

- Violent Katherine and Arrogant Petruchio

- Virginal Bianca and Romantic Lucentio

- Sounds a lot like a soap opera

- Or a Saturday morning sitcom

- Saved by the Bell: The Paduan Years

- Not too far off

- The Merchant of Venice

- Shylock steals the show

- So does Al Pacino

- “Hoo-ah”

- It sure rains a lot in Venice

- When it rains it pours

- Just ask Shylock

- A Jewish moneylender

- The punishment for not paying him back?

- He seems to like sixteen ounces of flesh

- Say hello to his little friend

- Don’t ask

- This one seems more dramatic to me

- But wait!

- They are choosing casket designs!

- How romantic. . .

- Sure, there are some hearts aflutter

- But I would argue there’s more love in Hamlet

- Deception

- Duplicity

- Dishonesty

- Isn’t alliteration fun?

- Shakespearean sonnets

- Do they rhyme?

- Most of the time

- And they always conclude after fourteen lines

- They are at times confusing

- Always brain-bruising

- Their meanings discovered through deep perusing

- Written to both women and men

- But sometimes to more than just a friend

- There is one thing I must admit:

- The idea of comparing a garden and a sonnet

- Well it bothered my brain just a little bit

- 154 personal sonnets of William Shakespeare

- Into his private collection did we peer

- In my book, that nosiness is quite queer

- It does not matter if he was writing to his mistress

- (Or mister, depending on how you see all this)

- My opinion on the matter (well, at least the gist):

- His intimate works should have been kept private

- His worshippers at least owe him that teensy bit

- A Midsummer Night’s Dream

- More fun than a barrel of monkeys

- Or fairies, for that matter

- Home of the sneaky Puck and the tricky Oberon

- O, the fun these fairies have

- Look, it’s a love square

- Triangles would be too simple

- Everyone loves someone

- And hates someone

- Sounds like high school

- And then there is Nick Bottom

- What an ass. . .

- He is the best over-actor of his generation

- That would make him Shakespeare’s Nicolas Cage, I guess

- Again, I digress

- There are so many characters involved

- It is sort of like the Shakespearean version of ER

- Or maybe Lost

- Deception

- Duplicity

- Dishonesty

- Déjà vu

- Isn’t alliteration fun?

- Did I mention that Bottom turns into a donkey?

- And then apparently makes love to a fairy named Titania?

- Hmm… It must have slipped my mind.

- So what of that magical bestiality?

- I would just as soon say “Don’t ask” again

- Don’t ask

- Twelfth Night

- More deception

- More dishonesty

- And a special form of duplicity

- O, the alliteration abounds!

- Twins think the other is dead after a shipwreck

- So what do they do?

- Viola dresses up like a man

- Gains the confidence of a Duke

- Falls in love with him in the process

- Gains the love of a lady named Olivia

- Sebastian also dresses like a man (rightfully so)

- Maintains the love of a sea captain named Antonio

- Gets into fights with drunk men

- Gains the love of a lady named Olivia

- Olivia is confused, for the record

- And then there’s Malvolio

- O, that cross-gartered fool

- My favorite play by William Shakespeare

- I once acted as Sebastian

- So I guess I’m biased

- I still think it is the most entertaining of his comedies

- I also picture Sir Toby as a high school girl in a fat suit though

- So my vision is a little tweaked

- “He has been most notoriously abused”

- You can say that again, Olivia

- The Tempest

- Another shipwreck

- More oddball characters

- Shakespeare’s final play

- It’s a doozy, too. . .

- Dark, dreary, and depressing

- Yeah, you knew it was coming

- There’s magic

- There’s a virginal daughter

- And a deformed, savage slave

- Just call him Caliban the Fishman

- Beware the slithering plot

- A plot to kill, that is

- Did I mention that it is dark and depressing?

- It is certainly not your 21st century chick flick

- A proper send off for the revered Shakespeare?

- Probably

- A chance to say goodbye through a central character?

- Most likely

- One of the greatest plays he wrote?

- Some would say so

- I am not some

- And so we complete this class

- And I must reveal one more thing about myself

- I am a surveyor; an examiner

- (Pun only partially intended)

- My class time was spent doing such

- While my fellow students basked in the glory and radiance of the Bard

- I watched

- While evaluations and discussions went on about ol’ Bill’s works

- I confess I merely listened

- While sonnets and plays were scrupulously bandied about

- I scoffed cynically

- And internally

- But it has been a pleasure to listen to fans discuss their love

- It’s like me with basketball

- Or Quentin Tarantino movies

- Or anything besides Shakespeare

- But I respect your fandom greatly

- And so I digress once more

- Honors English 236

- A class made by Shakespeare fans for Shakespeare fans

- I felt it was similar to an inside joke

- A select group of hardcore fans

- And me

- And where, you ask, have I been?

- While you studied these works complete with glossy eyes

- Well as the Shakespeare party raged on inside

- That was me on the outside

- Just looking in

- Just waiting to ramble on. . .

SO. . .

Goodnight - - -

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Because We Like Them So Much

It's been two weeks (well, just about) since a blog and SO MUCH has happened since I posted on Sunday May 6th. I'm gonna do a GRAB-BAG-esque post but it is not a GRAB-BAG. Just so you know :) Enjoy:

- Probably the biggest change that has happened in these two weeks is my age. I am now 20 (about time! . . I had already started telling people I was 20 around town). Is that an accomplishment? No, not really. But I am halfway to 40, so that counts for something I guess. . . It's very hard to believe how fast the time has gone. I was having a late-night dinner thing with Cy last night and I mentioned that we had been friends since 7th grade, which would have made us 13. And honestly, it seems like yesterday that we just met and were making jokes in Mr. Arnett's 1st period English class. But anyway. . . I'm 20 :) Yay for me! One more year til the big 2-1 baby!

- Another thing that's changed is that I will no longer be watching the NBA playoffs. The saddest moment of my year occurred last night when my Suns watched the goddamn Spurs build a 20 point lead in the fourth quarter, only to fight back and lose by 8 points. It was awful. I cried. I really did. I can't explain it, well, not very good at least. The sport of basketball is important to me. It is always there for me. It never lets me down. When I need to think about things, I grab a ball and head out to a court. My dream growing up was always to be a member of the Phoenix Suns and lead them to a championship. It's what I saw in my head when I closed my eyes to sleep. I want only a few things more than for my team to be victorious. I don't believe that there is no bigger fan of the Suns than me. And when they enter the playoffs, that is the time that I hang on their performance even more. And they have never pulled through for me. Ever. We are now at the point of the year where I have to wait until November to even watch them play again. That is a little upsetting. . . Caleb was also crying last night after the buzzer sounded. He was just hoping that "Steve (Nash) was ok" . . . As I hugged Caleb and my eyes were welling up, I asked him why we cared so much. I knew he didn't have the all-encompassing answer, but his response did make sense: "Because we like them so much." It was the sweetest answer he could have conjured up, and after he said it, I hugged him, told him I loved him and he went off to bed. . . I have never felt closer to him. My brother might only be 6 (he will be that old in July) but he already has the heart of a fan. And for that, I am thankful.

- I did officially quit BJ's on Wednesday the 9th. It went well actually. The General Manager Mike actually asked me to stay (not surprising - I assume he wants to keep as many people working there as possible) in some capacity. He offered me an Expo job (they are the guys who talk to the cooks and tell them what food to make, when to put it out, etc.) but I declined. I won't go into the grave details again, but I just didn't want to work that job anymore. My hands are now washed and I am free from that job. Done and done.

- This past Tuesday night I had the greatest non-Heather-involved time in recent memory. After work (I had to work an 1800-close shift at the FL) a guy from work and I went over to BJ's to eat. My buddy Chris (bowling buddy) met us there and then another guy I know from both JC and BJ's joined us once he got off work. We talked about basketball (all-things NBA related) from around 2200 to a little after 0100. It was fantastic. I would discuss it in greater detail but the brilliance of the night was in its all-over-the-place nature. We had a blast (at least I did) and I hope to do it again soon.

- I would post more, but I'm gonna finish with my recent addition to the AVC Examiner. I had to come up with a small article about SPIDER-MAN 3 (don't let my article dissuade you, I actually enjoyed the movie. . .) and I went with something new and fun. It's a loose prose (not poetry, per say) but I really like it. Anyway, here it is (in the article, it is not numbered, but I'm gonna leave them in place - o, and the greatest part of all was the title of the article. . . you'll see!)

  1. Spider-Man 3
  2. The web-slinger’s third adventure
  3. But is it worth your $10
  4. And why are movie tickets so expensive?
  5. But I digress
  6. So our friendly neighborhood Spider-Man. . .
  7. The trailers say he is turning evil
  8. Fighting himself
  9. Don’t we all
  10. Peter Parker is a nerd of nerds
  11. His girlfriend is a failed actress
  12. His best friend wants to kill him
  13. Sound familiar?
  14. Now black space goo is chasing him
  15. I hate when that happens
  16. Now a convict has morphed into a giant Sandman (who does look cool)
  17. But I have already seen The Mummy
  18. $150 million in its first weekend, huh?
  19. What’s the national deficit again?
  20. I guess Americans like their heroes
  21. “I understand him” we think
  22. I have two personalities
  23. I wear a mask
  24. I have powerful enemies (Uncle Sam anyone?)
  25. But I don’t have super powers
  26. Wish I did
  27. But then I would have to fight crime
  28. Or commit crimes
  29. The film runs 2 ½ hours
  30. Why do I have questions?
  31. A $250 million budget, huh?
  32. A plethora of computer graphics
  33. But who got paid to write the script?
  34. And who voted for Kirsten Dunst to sing?
  35. Or act?
  36. Topher Grace is cocky
  37. But he is certainly competent
  38. Thomas Haden Church broods
  39. And avoids being worthless
  40. So how can it fail!?!?
  41. It has so much going for it
  42. Maybe too much
  43. Too much hype
  44. Too many characters
  45. Not enough development
  46. Spider-Man 3
  47. The famous arachnid man returns
  48. Not a complete disappointment
  49. Not a total failure
  50. But on a Friday night?
  51. Keep your money in your wallet
  52. Or go rent Spider-Man 2
  53. Will there be a fourth film?
  54. I would bet $150 million
  55. Spider-Man 3
  56. Stan Lee’s crime-fighting super hero
  57. He is just a man
  58. And a spider
  59. And wealthy. . . now
  60. Crowds love Spider-Man
  61. How can Mary Jane hate on that?
  62. All he does is good
  63. Right?
  64. So why is his suit black?
  65. Why is black considered evil again?
  66. Tough times for Spidey
  67. Police radio echoing in his apartment
  68. Spider suit under his street clothes
  69. Bathroom breaks must be a bitch
  70. American flag
  71. Random, I know
  72. Seen the first two films?
  73. You understand then
  74. “Go get ‘em tiger”
  75. $150 million, huh?
  76. He got ‘em
  77. “Catches thieves just like flies”
  78. And dollars, too
  79. “Here comes the Spider-Man”
  80. Spider-Man 3
  81. A joke?
  82. Sometimes
  83. A serious drama?
  84. Not really.
  85. A high-budget soap opera on steroids?
  86. Absolutely
  87. Around-the-clock screenings
  88. Nonstop action
  89. Mind-numbing absurdity
  90. Spider-Man 3
  91. Just another sequel
  92. Thanks Hollywood
Anywho, have a good Saturday, and I will try to post tomorrow night (I'm trying to arrange a poker game at my house at the moment, so we'll see).

Goodnight for now. . .